About messing with the AP temptation. Oh man, do I get it!! Resist, however; it's a distraction that keeps you locked in the past and keeps her in the picture. Leave her behind
. The sooner the better.
As a former OW, I can’t agree more.
Not only would you be reactivating the affair in your mind, you’ll bring her right back with you. One of the best things that happened to me was when the man I was seeing simply stopped contacting me, it really ended things in my mind. Had he kept reaching out after our last blow up, I believe I’d still be right there in the thick of it, living and breathing that affair, and feeling like I needed it. Likewise if I had had any altercations or drama with his BS.
Kill her power. You do that by not letting her believe she has any power over your emotions. Let her know you’re in control, and the best way to do that is to ghost her. She doesn’t deserve to know how you are, how your marriage is, and if you’re recovering. Contacting her will give her a reason to contact your WS, and will allow her to paint a picture of turmoil in her head that will justify further wretched behavior.