I understand how you feel. My husband is 40 and I am 38. My discovery day of the affair was 14 months ago. For 8 months he had an affair with a 60 year old pathetic woman. She knew we were married as she met me before my husband. In her case she was bouncing frOM place to place to live, in and out of alcohol and drug rehabs, she was lonley..etc. she was easy and available. Except in my case the affair continued for a few months even after I found out. She was so 100% sure that my husband was leaving me for her...she stalked me, would harass me by text, phone, email...she was the one that blew the whistle on the affair. Looking back now...I see that she did all of those things out of sheer desperation. I think deep down she knew my husband wasn't leaving me and her only course of action was to try and get me to leave. To answer your questions...yes...spouces do leave their good wifes and husbands for an AP. It does happen all the time... sometimes it's short lived and they return to their spouces and marriage, other times not. Really depends on the people involved in suppose. But I do know this, it's less likely for a wayward spouse to love for an AP, and even when and if they do...less than 1% of that new relationship built on lies lasts once reality is in play. An affair is fantasy and fantasy can't exist with reality. I've also learned that age has very little to do with the affair. Your ex OW and mine are a lot in common, selfish, self esteem issues, lonely...the list goes on.
Female BS, D-day 1/03/2017, I'm going to rebuild me like a remix,
and raise my soul like a Phoenix