Robin1971
What are your opinions when asked the reason you are divorcing? I am all for telling people he cheated, no details needed, but " he cheated, I tried to get over it, worked on it for a year and could not'. The end.

Some thoughts are ... That puts people in an ackward situation, well than they shouldn't ask such a personal question I feel. They could just say, I'm sorry or prayers to you.


Thoughts...have any of you told the reasoning behind your divorce ?
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blythespirit
I've only told family and a couple of very close, very trustworthy friends the real reason behind our separation. And only because I need to be able to talk about what's going on. To anyone else I just say that we're separated and don't give a reason. And I only offer that information if it becomes unavoidable. I also make it clear that there is no issue of violence or reason to be concerned for the kids, etc., and that he and I both continue to be fully involved in our children's lives and that the arrangement is amicable (although I sometimes don't actually feel real amicable). I would approach a divorce, if we get there, the same way.
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Adrift
All our close family and friends know what I have done and why we are at this point.

For anyone outside the marriage that asks, I agree it's over the line.  I might just say it's personal.  Or, if it's someone I trust I will tell them that I violated my wife's trust on more than one occasion and it cost me my family as I know it.

You have to be careful with giving that info to casual acquaintances.  You never know what lens people view things through based on their own experiences.  Sharing that you are the victim of infidelity could have unforeseen consequences.
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UrbanExplorer
For what it's worth, I went on a ladies' weekend that included someone who was getting divorced. She just thanked people for their concern, said it was personal, and said she didn't want to get into it. 18 months later, I still don't know, and we are friendly acquaintances.
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Fionarob
I have only told very close friends and family.  I don't think anyone else needs to know.  I also don't want to risk the whole story getting back to my children at this point in their lives, they are too young. 
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Guiltguilt
If the person knows us, I ensure they know it is my fault. My BS had life changing surgery days after dday, and it would be very easy for people to add two and two and get five
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