An affair is a murderer.....it kills the person you fell in love with and it kills you, the person you were before D-Day. At times it feels like I was standing at a closed door, I didn’t try to open the door I just stood there....then slowly the door opens and all you see is black and then a hand slowly comes out to pull you into the darkness...you just stand there. You do not resist because you have lost control, your choice has been taken from you to enter or not....so you are pulled into a place you don’t want to go a place someone else has made for you, and you find out the place is called “THE JOURNEY OF DISCOVERY AND SURVIVAL”. I’m told you are in control of how you deal with the darkness in Discovery. There are miles and miles of books, weekends, DVD, etc. to help you through this journey. What you are not told, I’ve discovered is (no pun intended)....the person you fell in love with died the moment he/she made the conscience decision to cheat. So, now you are in mourning for two people, the person you fell in love with and the person you were when you fell in love. At the end of your mourning the death of the two people you were the closest, you are given a new title “SURVIVOR”. No, not like the popular television show with cheers and applause and a big monetary prize. You are not out of the the darkness yet. Now you are expected to fall in love with a stranger.....if you are to continue on with the marriage.