As hard as it may seem to do, LEAVE, or better yet make HIM leave. Let him go to whatever it is he so badly wants. It's the only way either of you will truly know how you feel or what you want. He is LYING his a** off by putting you off and saying just wait until this or that. All lies. I have been there too, more than once. It hurts, it sucks, but it will not change and he will just be more secretive to continue the affair. Don't be a doormat. He is not expecting you to leave and knows you will be there so he is a cake eater. So selfish and hurtful. Show him the door and don't let him see how sad you are. Be strong in front of him and cry and scream in private. He is disrespecting you so badly and only cares about his own wants/needs, at your expense. It's so true, all the sayings, if you love something set it free. Time will tell and it will be hard but you would be amazed at how strong you really are. Try looking at this situation from an outside point of view, as if your best friend were in your shoes, what advice would you give her and how would you see what he is doing. You would probably be telling her to leave, even if only for a while. Be strong and surround yourself with people who love you. Stay busy. Don't give in to his lies.
Female BS, two kids age 10 & 13
Married 16 years, together for 23 years total D Days - Feb 2013, June 2015 and Sept 2017 All with the same OW Separated