Illusion, I am so so sorry. Infidelity is never good, whether youve been married 20 years or engaged but geesh, your story is so bad bad bad. I hate cheaters.
You can take my advice or leave it, but I would only go to a counselor trained in sex addiction to assess whether or not your wh is a sex addict. Here's why: I doubt this his first "bad sex " behavior in his life. And only only only if he joined a 12 step for sex addicts and truly worked on himself w self limits, accountability and counseling would I even think about taking him back.
I'm only trying so hard bc of my kids and I've spent over half my life w my cheater. I cry at night wishing I had never had kids w him , even though I am grateful for my kids, I hate him for doing this to us. I've read hundreds of Sa stories and spent dozens of hours reading about sex addicts. Has he ever had a porn problem?? Unless he addressed his LYING problem (it's one thing to cheat but then he lied to you and might not ever have told you unless ow man told you) with some serious serious counseling and his sex problem. Keep us posted!!
Trying to make marriage work after my husband's 15 years of affairs. Just found out. Currently in house separation.