Keepabuzz
I thought I would start a thread where people can post helpful quotes that they have found on their healing journey. Here is one of my favorites. I find it motivating, when I don’t feel strong, to remind myself that I am, and continue to get stronger, and stronger. 

“It doesn’t get easier, you just get stronger”. 
Male BS, D-day July 2015, trying to stay out of the dark.....
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Vanessa
"Love is never wasted, for its value does not rest upon reciprocity.” C.S Lewis

When I feel like I wasted 20 years of my life on a lie.  I remember it was real to me.
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AnywhereButHere
This quote helped put life in perspective for me when it seemed to have been destroyed:

"It's true, our lives can pass small and unnoticed by the masses and we are no less dignified for having lived quietly. In fact, I've come to believe there's something noble about doing little with your life save offering love to a person who is offering it back." - Donald Miller in 'Scary Close'
BH, 5+ Mo EA, DDay 3/8/18
"...regarding all as God after God."
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anthro
"Revenge is a dish best served cold."

Okay maybe that's not quite healing 😉 
Formerly known as Anthropoidape... male bs, long affair, d-day Feb 2017.
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BorealJ
This quote helped put life in perspective for me when it seemed to have been destroyed:

"It's true, our lives can pass small and unnoticed by the masses and we are no less dignified for having lived quietly. In fact, I've come to believe there's something noble about doing little with your life save offering love to a person who is offering it back." - Donald Miller in 'Scary Close'
Maybe in a new thread, could you offer a bit of a review of this book?  Curious what you took from it as a BS.  It was something I was curious about in exploring my wife's tendencies, but I realize after betrayal how it's easy to fear intimacy and may actually offer insight to myself. 
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Dirazz
Mine is on my profile picture here

” Sometimes the things that hurt you the most, teach you the greatest lessons of life”.  
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MC
"No Mud, No Lotus"

-Thich Nhat Hanh

A lotus first makes its home under water, surrounded by mud and other dirty conditions. As the lotus continues to grow, it pushes through its murky surroundings making way towards a clearer surface. In time, the pod surfaces above the water, freeing itself from the filth and each petal slowly blooms to expose its beauty.  

[image]
________________
Male BS
D-Day 3.15.2017


Taking care of myself, as we all deserve to do.
Encouraging all to bolster their: Emotional Health, Physical Health and Spiritual Health
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Jennifer
BorealJ wrote:
Maybe in a new thread, could you offer a bit of a review of this book?  Curious what you took from it as a BS.  It was something I was curious about in exploring my wife's tendencies, but I realize after betrayal how it's easy to fear intimacy and may actually offer insight to myself. 


I HIGHLY recommended this book. There are so many quotable sayings. I have read this book several times and get something from it each and every time.
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Jennifer
Quotes:
"Always challenge the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves,because those will absolutely do us in." Brene Brown
Really anything by Brene Brown!

"You can't spend your whole life facing the wrong way. You'll never see what's ahead of you if all you ever see are ghosts of your past."

I'll probably post more soon..I love quotes!
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Dirazz
Another great one.....

” YOU CANT START THE NEXT CHAPTER OF YOUR LIFE IF YOU KEEP RE-READING THE LAST ONE” 
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AnywhereButHere
BorealJ wrote:
Maybe in a new thread, could you offer a bit of a review of this book?  Curious what you took from it as a BS.  It was something I was curious about in exploring my wife's tendencies, but I realize after betrayal how it's easy to fear intimacy and may actually offer insight to myself. 


What I mainly took away from the book were Miller's perspectives on maintaining a level of detachment in a relationship. He grounds it in the truth that we should not, subconsciously, strive to have our spouses fill the 'God-shaped' void in our lives - and our spouses never seem so inadequate to the task as when they have cheated and treated the most valuable part of their life as so much garbage. When you have lost a sense of yourself in your marriage, you're doing it wrong.

This wasn't the principle focus of the book - just the last few chapters, esprcially 'You Do Not Complete Me'. Overall, the book was about deploying false fronts in relationships. But the insights on 'detachment' were quite valuable. I'll be re-reading the last chapters again and again through the coming years.
BH, 5+ Mo EA, DDay 3/8/18
"...regarding all as God after God."
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Jennifer
"Until you heal the wounds of your past, you are going to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, alcohol, drugs, work, cigarettes, with sex; But eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. You must find the strength to open your wounds, stick your hands inside, pull out the core of the pain that is holding you in the past, the memories and make peace with them." -Iyanla Vanzant

"You are not your illness, not your trauma, wounds, or hurt, you are not defined by the pain in your mind, you are illness second, and human first."

"Sometimes, the deepest healing is not something you can measure, or something anyone else you can see. Sometimes, it is being able to cry when you need to, show up when you didn't think you could, be just a little bit better than you were the day before. Sometimes, healing is knowing that just getting through the day is enough. Sometimes, healing is not a wave, but a ripple, the tiniest shift that radiates and touches every part of you. Healing is not about how much you succeed, it is whether or not you like yourself even if you don't."
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ThrivenotSurvive
oh Jennifer- I love all of those!  
BS - Female
Married 27 years, one adult child
DD May 2016

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” - V Frankl
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seventy7
"There is no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bear witness that a man had the greatest of courage, the courage to suffer" - Viktor E. Frankl

"Take your time healing, as long as you want. Nobody knows what you've been through. How could they know how long it will take you to heal?" 
Male BS
Married 17 years
D-Day 11/1/2017
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Skelling
not a quote per se but a song that means a lot and gave me strength


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