MC
I hesitate to even use the word anniversary, so maybe I will just call it "x years since".

The "one year since" was difficult for me and I was relieved when it had passed.  My IC warned me that it would be.  Interestingly, for me the lead up to "one year since" was worse than the actual days.  I am in the middle of "two years since". The sting is lesser.  

So my question, Does it get less painful for anniversaries to pass as years pass?  If "two years since" is easier than "one year since" is "three years since" even easier?  What about five, eight, twenty years since?  Does it ever go away entirely?

I have several "x years since" to contend with.  Thanks to a ridiculously detailed discovery, I know they slept together 11/11/2016, 1/14/2017 and 1/18/2017.  My D-day was 3/15/2017.  I remember all of us being at a Halloween party at his house 10/29/2016.  I remember all of us being at a Super Bowl party at his house on 2/5/2017.  I remember my wife and I celebrating our February birthdays together and know now that they had dinner for her birthday too, even though the sex was over by then.  I think about the Christmas shopping list of hers that I found where she bought both he and I a necktie.  Symbolically me being one of two on that list.  Date after date, annual event after annual event I feel haunted by what I know now but didn't know then.  I just hope it gets less and less painful.

Male BS, D-day 3-15-17 
________________
Male BS
D-Day 3.15.2017


Taking care of myself, as we all deserve to do.
Encouraging all to bolster their: Emotional Health, Physical Health and Spiritual Health
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Keepabuzz
I just posted about this on the other thread. It does get easier. I call them “painanniversaries”, I cant claim that term. Someone else on here said that once and it really fit for me. For me year 1 painanniveraries were by far and away the hardest, year 2 was easier, and year 3 was even less difficult. I can only speak to that as that’s where I am in the process, but I don’t think it will ever “go away”. My d-day will always be a tough day for me I think, but many others I think may go away, I guess we will see. 
Male BS, D-day July 2015, trying to stay out of the dark.....
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ssix6pack
On New Year’s Eve, 1998, I was sexually abused by a family member. 
I remember New Year’s Eve ‘99. I went and cried in the bathroom.
Slowly, I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t even remember the vicious abuse until a day or two later. Or, I think, “oh yeah. That was today. Crazy.”
but, I don’t hurt or cry or think about it much. 


I’m betting it’s something like that.

Of course, come February, I may need a bathroom to cry in. 
Betrayed female
2/11/18, d day #1. 
1/2019, d day #2.
Over a decade of unfaithfulness. 
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surviving
My DDay was September 5, 2013.  I have a list of things to pray for your husband each and every day of the year.  On September 5, the prayer is this:  "Pray that your husband will be faithful to his wedding vows.  Pray that he will have a desire to cultivate your relationship as a sign of his loyalty and commitment to you, and as a picture of Christ's love for the church."  So, every year I am reminded of DDay and the breaking of our wedding vows.  So, does it get easier?  Actually, it does.  Even though I have this reminder every year on my DDay, it doesn't hit me as hard as it did at first.  I am still saddened by the fact that the vows meant nothing to him (he broke them on our honeymoon and many moons after that).  But, it doesn't hurt as bad as it did the first year.
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Jennifer
Every person is different and yet what the others say tend to be true. I find the each year gets easier and better. Does not mean there are not thoughts during this time but hurt feelings begin to fade.
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