I also told my husband I wish he were dead. Right after D Day.
I have regretted that, but do agree that death would be easier to recover from. Nelson, your comment that your daughter is struggling with the fact that her life has not changed much since her father’s death has really resonated with me. My daughters have not been in any type of regular contact with their father for 8 months. They have seen him twice since he left. I have not seen him in 8 months. Two of the girls say they dont miss him at all, that their life is very much the same as when he was in the affair. He was never around. My fear is that one day they will regret this lost time, especially if a tragedy, like yours occurred. The sad part of my story is that my girls told me about the affair. I have tried to encourage a relationship and have even tried to give him advice but neither side listens to me. I live with this fear, disappointment and guilt (he blames me for the girls not talking to him) everyday. Neslon, I admire your strength!!
D-Day#1 Dec 19, 2017
D-Day#2 Jan 13, 2018 5 year “on/off affair” Separated Married 25 years, together 35