...I think if I asked him what would help our marriage he would say for me to be more affectionate, give him more praise, make him feel equal in the marriage, give him compliments, make him feel loved etc etc. Obviously I understand he needs those things, he is dealing with a large amount of shame and guilt and is desperate for approval and compliments from me to make him feel good about himself.
My question is will those things really help him to heal? Is that all he needs or is that only part of the problem?...
I think there are two questions that need to be considered. The first (and most important at this point) is what is needed for HIM to heal? The second is what is needed for the marriage to heal?
All those things you mentioned are definitely worth attending to in regard to building a healthy marriage. But, as you mentioned in your post, doing all those things do not address the need for him to understand what IN HIM needs to be addressed. The lack of those things did not cause him to have an affair (despite what he may claim) so starting to do them now will not address what allowed him to justify an affair as a solution to his discomfort or displeasure. He had other choices; and both you and he need to know how/why you can trust that DIFFERENT choices will be made in the future.
He needs some more insight into that, but I know a lot of people (esp men) do not care to do that kind of work. It's too vulnerable. It's easier to focus on the changes they want their spouse's to make so they won't feel discomfort or displeasure in the future. (News Flash: You WILL experience those things in the future. Every marriage does at one time or another.)
You will likely only begin to feel trust returning when you experience him accepting his responsibility and working at gaining more insight into his affair choices as well as understanding what changes are necessary to guard against it happening again.