Brandi
So I posted before that the ow has a post about her on a homewrecker site and my husband wanted to pay to have it removed. Well he did yesterday without telling me. It was 3 grand that he paid without telling me and said it was his Christmas gift to himself. He says he's sorry he hurt me but he didnt want her threat to sue us over our heads. I have told him many times that she has no legal case because there is no proof as to who emailed it to the site and it was full of true statements so it is not defimation/libel or slander because it was all true. During the last few weeks we have had a lot of good days and during the good days I tell him what I need. I told him earlier this week that I need for him to think of my feelings in any and all decisions he makes. Obviously he still does not do that. I also told him I was to know of any contact with any female and he also did not do that. So I am debating packing the kids and staying at my moms house tonight. But I want to make sure I am not overreacting.
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Kalmarjan
Wait...

He paid 3k, without your consent, in order to cover up his affair with the OW? Who did he pay this to?

Has there been contact between the two?

If it were me, I'd be doing this with my wife at my side, with her... As a team. Nothing clandestine.

I don't think you are over reacting. I think you feel like you're not in a safe space because he has violated your trust, again. You've set a boundary, and he has violated it.

Action, réaction.
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Brandi
There has been no cell phone contact. As far as I know no other contact. He said he did it because he never wants to talk about her again and wants that chapter closed. That I react for revenge and that's why he couldn't tell me. I've been working very hard to control that. But he says he stands by his decision.
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