Mia2003
I don't know this I should just our son becoming a teenager or because of what has happened but I am concerned by some of the behaviours exhibited by our son recently.

The other week he text his dad asking him why he left.

He's lied to me twice about two separate incidents and yesterday I got an email from school saying he'd commented and stated something quite nasty about a teacher. He saw the teacher today but the teacher said he didn't seem remorseful about what he had said. He was asked to come back at lunchtime which he apparently didn't. I went and got him I( im a teacher at the same school) and he swore he had stood outside the teachers classroom all lunch and he got really teary.

He seems to have started acting up and I'm really worried. I'm really worried how this is affecting him.
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Anna26
I think you're right to be concerned Mia. Some of it could be classic teenage behaviour ( a lot of us have been there!) but it could also be how what has happened is coming out. Your son doesn't sound very communicative, and maybe that's because he doesn't want to load even more worries on to your shoulders. But the whole thing is probably on his mind deep down. He wants answers, just like you, and his family as it was more than likely. Of course, this is just my take on things. Will he go to counselling if you go with him, or does he have another, preferably adult person he can talk to? Perhaps a close friend? Although I think boys of that age are not too good at opening up to their mates about things!
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TimT
Anna26 wrote:
...Will he go to counselling if you go with him, or does he have another, preferably adult person he can talk to? Perhaps a close friend? Although I think boys of that age are not too good at opening up to their mates about things!


I agree with Anna26. Finding a trusted adult who would be able to offer a safe place for your son to explore what's going on and his reactions would be extremely beneficial so that certain behaviors don't become patterns.

I wouldn't be surprised if your son actually does want to talk about it, but the fear of being vulnerable (and knowing even what to say about the confusion) can keep him closed. Do some asking/investigation to find a counselor that might relate well with your son. If your son is open to it, let him be part of the process. 

Ask him to commit to a single session and then you can re-evaluate the next steps. He may find tremendous relief in a therapeutic relationship that provides expression the the pent-up thoughts & feelings he's experiencing.
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